fin feline

the tendency of fashion labels to produce short clips for promoting their products really works with me

fascination doesn´t mean creating a need to own things and therefore buying things

2010

learning stations/reflections of the year/no ranking/random

1 driving licence
2 again turkish language course, again forgetting everything
3 did not move flats
4 first year in "regular" job/first pair of serious business pants
5 the laptop and me/ read a lot nakedpastor, it gave me comfort
6 Ukraijna
7 became lutheran
8 spend never before so much time in brothels (only a little in 2009)
9 many short trips to old friends in new places
10 finally ordered an organic-regional-vegetable-box/preparing a lot of meals for the living commune
11 sewing something usable
12 became somehow "hard"/learned and read so much and so often still feeling helpless and unknowing/ not knowing is ok
13 tried rock-climbing and waterskiing
14 not sure if I found my "power house" in Pilates (Deine Gebärmudda, Alter!)
15 third unsucessful try to plant something on the balcony
16 favourite food of the year: Mango, pumpkin seeds and pomelo
17 being close to someone
18 feelings of loneliness and fear
19 one side short cut/going to the hairdresser anyway
20 I saw somebody being born

(got this idea from an online magazin, who asked people instead of making new years resolutions to think about 20 things goals/wishes they actually learned /accomplished during the last year)

starring

the region I´m coming from is very much focused on stars during christmas time
in Denmark christmas seems to be more about hearts...
Though I´m not a big christmas fan, the craftiness of making stars fascinates me, working around a center, lighting them.

a collection of the most important (hand made) star forms at my mom´s:

plauen lace star




















fröbel star (The smaller ones)




















bascutti star



















herrnhut star




















pagoda stars

paper-ponpom-decoration

What to do with all this packaging paper?

Before




















After

Getting domestic/winter weekends

Travelling a lot for work and also for friendships
I somehow have developed now a sense of just wanting to stay at home and calm down the weekends. Doing simple, maybe shallow things. Making my place comfortable. Looking for nice home-items.

Christmas is a hard time for me.
It´s just stressful, klimbim, I can´t have the glitter, green and red combinations, the too much...
my people are known for bad taste

But if you can´t beat them, join them?

I was out with a friend, collecting walnuts and left over apples
and climbing trees for mistletwigs.

My mom send me some advent candles. Someone gave me this left over frame on a fleemarket, I got some nordic inspiration on how one can also decorate more beautiful. This is my try. I have already eaten all the clementines.




















I tried to make some chocolate-butter-truffles. Some with sesame.














Found these perfect eggholders in Stockholm.

nord

work has been extremely stressful
so I was glad to have holidays

visiting friends in cph and sthlm
thank you
























One thing i enjoy while travelling is to look for simple (domestic) beauty
which I found e.g. in Jess´house

födseldag

In Copenhagen

A friend of mine made me aware of this video,

which is also wonderful to me as it is so against the present anti-immigrant discourse (not only) in DK, trying to select people according to their "usefulness" for society.

In the vid people are singing the Danish birthday song. I like that different countries have different birthday songs. The "Happy Birthday to you" has become all too common. In one of the traditional German Birthday songs there is is verse:

"...How nice that you were born,

otherwise we would have missed you very much..."

I want to keep that in mind.

wise said

was lately on a conference on "migration and development"
Gibril Faal, Direktor von GK Partners und Chairman der
African Foundation for Development (AFFORD), London/UK
was saying
"there are 3 reasons for people to migrate:

• learn,
• earn or
  
• yearn"

And "Europe would break down if all illegal immigrants would go on strike"

grün muss es blühn

`happy about a few new (for me) greeneries:

• A former flat mate made me aware of a few mates of him that started the avocado online store which sells all kids of stuff which is either organic, fair trade, produced with little energy or what ever else falls under the "sustainability" label
  

• Read and saw lately stuff about the work of professor Michael Braungart which I find very interesting. Having his background in greenpeace activism he is nowadays a very respected chemician proclaiming eco-effectiveness by cradle to cradle desgin of products
  
  
• Schuhsign is a new onlinestore for shoes which are mainly produced in Europe, organic dyed leather, organic materials, bla, bla... a few of them quite wearable from it´s looks
  
  
• My favourite drugsrore lately sells organic cotton q-tips and tissue stuff in easy recyclable packaging
  

whats on a kitchen table

it´s harvest time
let´s have late roses
and pumkin pie

women without men

want to see this movie since so long

step on it

Germany has something in common with Afghanistan, Bhutan, Burundi, Haiti, Libanon, Mauretania, Myanmar, Nepal, Northkorea, and Somalia.
These countries don´t have general speed limits, as it is with a lot of parts of the German Autobahn.

Driving school goes like this (2nd time on the autobahn):
" Go left, step on it." My driving teacher puts some techno music on.
So loud I can hardly understand her, only: "I said, step on it!"
Me: "Ehm, i´m already at 160 km/h?" She: "So? Come on, step on it!"
I step on it. 170, 180, 185.
Finally she was satisfied. Yes, I had fun.
I had to switch to the left lane again. The BMW behind me was pushing.
It´s pure megalomania.

August

heulen kannste, wenn du Urlaub hast

( u can cry when you´re on holidays)

Polska- Ukrajina

had the pleasure of a small-roadtrip to the east
in the sprinter- bus of my cousin

i love to see the kilometres running by
morning swim in a lake of the karpaty
climbing mountains
flowers in krakow
we tried to find a man in the mountains where my cousin has promised to bring him some solarcollectors for his roof so he can live from solarenergy

We spend hours at EU-borders
I wake up as ukrainian borders guards enter the bus and start to check everything
borschtsch and huge markets
an blaubeeren satt essen
old ladies letting their cows eat from the roadside

visiting friends in the small towns and villages
watching german world-cup-games in the house of the local footballtrainer for the small boys
blümchentapete und limonade mit kaugummigeschmack
the wheatfields have the color of grapefruit
always, always black coffee

"I give you stronger wodka" for my swollen knee
Dill and sour cream
night train to kyiv
sleeping on the park bench with people looking strange at us
halwa for breakfast
your mother is somewhere else in Europe working in care and household

getting our backs set by an old lady in the tourquoise house
I could hear the sound of my bones

+7

Sheep.
My cousin is a shepherd.
She is taking care of a big herd of about 200 mother sheep and more lambs.
They are used for landscape conservation ( keeping the gras short) in a landscape full of fruit trees where no machines are used.
Visited her for one weekend and liked feeding the lambs and helping guiding the herd from one green place to another.
I miss animals in my daily life.

+6

ehm, crafting something.
yes, I know its quite a trend right now.
And yes it´s something positive.
No special skills, no plan.
Kitsch is ok.

+5

balkan beats, russian polka
nu klezmer

I recommed "electro trumpet"
"Ausgelassene Stimmung" is the codeword.
Sweat and flowers.
My body became immediately happy.
Honestly, we should dance more.

+4

public book storages:
what do you do when public libraries are for free but need your identity card for registration...
or are too far away when you are just hanging out in the park and could need a nice book?
Public book shelves where people can just bring and take books as they like.

(picture from www.dayinmylife.de)

+3

living communes.
Still.
So many.
I love it.

Dance-floor-music-laundry-cellar-... of the house my friend currently lives in with 7 other human beings.

+2: we discovered something unbelievable: every woman is different!

says the window of a lingerie boutique.
they honestly had mannequins in different sizes.

+ 1: weekends away/ RUHR

working here and spending weekends somewhere else
now many of my friends again live all over the country
had the priviledge to spend some weekends again in capital and former capitals
many nice things to discover in this country, I thought of posting some positive stuff which I spotted and liked:

+ 1:

Ruhr 2010
many shut down coal mines become places of culture and design
now european capital of culture




















a 360° cinema in an old coal hopper




















gallery in huge old salt storage hall







































café in da industry

use your voice

there is a e-petition (a real one) online on the German Bundestag to decide about ending the "Residenzpflicht" (obligation to stay in the municipality where you are registered) for asylum seekers, you can register and give your voice for this here

Pro Asyl has started an action of sending postcards to German Minister of Interior de Maizière and EU-Commissioner Cecilia Malström to advocate for unaccompanied minor asylum seekers in Greece. The card reads following:

"in the EU member state Greece child refugees are
detained, harassed and left homeless without any
protection. They are not provided with any care and
accommodation that is suitable for children. The
human rights and dignity of these unaccompanied
minors are being violated systematically.
The best interest of the child is the highest priority.
A humane solution has to be found. Please advocate
personally for their relocation to other
EU member states."

You can order these postcards for free here. More information on the topic for example here
Maybe there are similar action to the ministers of interior of your country?

the march post

spring
hayfever

read a few interior blogs
and thought I could show my new room,
vanity, I know
but making a home

to put it like in the blogs:

- box from grocery store
- white table found on the streets at 2 at night when returning from work
- bed: flat
-wooden floors: original, with dirt between the panels telling from the last 50 years
this house used to be a "red-light-bar"

I appreciate how the owner of the house has kept all the old details and floors, just rebuilding the necessary and building the whole house as a community building. And yes energy-efficient and the whole stuff, hardly have to use heaters. Feels strange to somehow have so much "luxury".


clock: was having a walk on the hills in another city with friends. We passed an old villa, where some people held a sell-out of their furniture
is good for watching time while boiling eggs

flowers: dutch































lamp: Danish trödelladen
phonetable from fleamarket
it was raining- she sold it for 20€























sunlight: for free

celebration

Celebration of womenhood is celebration of life

Malta resettlement

yes,
yesterday the news finally became official: Germany is going to take up 100 refugees from Malta in 2010, mostly from Somalian, Eritean and Sudanese people. I´m really happy to hear Germany is finally showing a little more responsibility towards this issue.
I think of all the young people I have met, desperately hoping for a better life, not really getting a life outside their camps and how hard is was to try to encourage them for patience, keeping on hoping and in the meantime getting as much education as possible when you don´t really know yourself what will happen.
It might be a drop on a hot stone, or rather a cup of water. But it hopefully makes a positive difference for these 100.

In the meantime Frontex warned Malta to advertise too much on resettlement as this would be "exploited by organised crime in Libya to market Malta as the destination to send asylum seekers and irregular immigrants."
Ok, its surely neccessary to be aware of the structures of organised crime who are exploiting the hopes for a better life and will to survive of many people. But first of all we are only talking about resettlement of people who have a protection status which means they are coming from countries which are either war-torn and/or where political persecution is on the daily agenda.
So the choice to leave is not just made upon the information of possible destination countries but also on a will to survive.

The will to survive will find its way.

Organised crime in Libya was also able to flourish, because the EU build up its border control structures, where Frontex is part of, in a way that people are not able to enter the EU regularly and seek asylum and protection.

Moreover, people don´t just get their information from smugglers quoting Maltese government on advertising resettlement programmes. People have networks, use the internet, have friends or relatives who´ve been resettled, etc.

It´s not just a "problem" to be dealt with, or naive victims who´ve been misinformed. WE are people with each individial and collective stories making our choices mostly based on a will to survive and live dignified lives.

People will find their way.

random

the T9system of my mobile suggests "EU" before "Du" (you), quite scary

Unexpected compliment of the year 2009. During a lift-conversation: "I never met a women knowing so much about refridgeration engineering."
haha, I hardly know anything about it, I´m just interested in the topic, was just listening to him and giving some thoughts on what I read in the newspaper... fun anyway

from the age of 24 years one has to pay more into the compulsory long term care insurance, in case you don´t have children. With the age of 23 it was still ok not to have children, but now, really girl, you should get going;)

reality check

"Everything that meets the eye
Is everything there is to life" this beautiful mess, 2003

Dreams are not enough
Good intentions are not enough
Words and declarations are not enough
it only can be a beginning.

I´m more and more convinced:
If the invisible does not manifest in the visible it does not mean anything nore becomes reality.

Uhm, it´s sometimes quite sad looking at myself. "But I have pleaded in prayer for you, ..., that your faith should not fail."Luke 22,32

Also:
Der universale Anspruch, der in 1989 steckte, das Rahmensprengende und Grenzüberschreitende, die Neubelebung der schon müde gewordenen demokratischen Idee: Daraus haben die Europäer wenig gemacht. Ein Jahrzehnt Verfassungsdebatte, die mit dem Lissabon-Vertrag minimalistisch zu Ende gebracht wurde, hat den Geist der Selbstbeschäftigung und der Überschätzung des Institutionenwesens in die EU zurückgebracht. Großzügiger als jede andere Weltgegend gibt sie staatliche Entwicklungshilfe – und macht den praktischen und moralischen Effekt durch eine engherzige Schutz- und Bevorzugungspolitik für die eigene Landwirtschaft wieder zunichte. Die EU begrüßt die Mühseligen und Beladenen, die über das Meer bei ihr Zuflucht suchen, nicht mit einer Freiheitsstatue, sondern mit Patrouillenbooten der Küstenwache und Auffanglagern für illegale Migranten. Vor dem anderen, Fremden, vor dem Draußen hat Europa Angst – nicht nur vor der Konkurrenz, der Globalisierung, den Billiglöhnern und Outsourcing-Standorten, sondern auch vor jenen, die im EU-Paradies nach Wohlstand und Lebenschancen suchen. Der »europäische Traum« ist den Europäern selbst unheimlich.

shaping words

I recommend this article

'Africa is to be pitied, worshipped or dominated. 'Binyavanga Wainaina
How to write about Africa

A friend of mine always says: 'Language shapes reality.' I think this is very true.
This is quite a topic that really makes me mumble, also in my present work. How do I speak about the people I work with or work for and claim to care for? How do we represent people when we write about them, also to get money from potential givers to charity?

To be continued...

nomadic.better

My flatmate lies on my bed and sleeps while I blog and try to order the many papers on my desk. I feel like protecting her. I´m sad to leave. Just received my official Diploma today. Had to look for over 15 minutes in the new building for the office of our deacon. Suddenly, I felt old and a little melanchonic. Can´t even find rooms anymore. Desk is also filled with papers about new working contract in the south and contract for renting new room. Quite thankful everything worked out that quickly. Still wondering if that quick is that good. But looking forward to it.

Back in home country again.

Spend last weeks in home region and Netherlands. Meeting friends again, attending two weddings, meeting new few weeks old human beings. Birthday-parties. Talks about breast-feeding and pink-needs for girls. Saying good-bye to my brother going to the army. I tried preventing it. Hope you are all well.

That was fast.

I fought the water

3 years ago bought a bikini again
after haven't had any for years
slowly started to get used to open water again

I get pressure on my lungs and start to get nervous
when I have to cross a lake
but I did it to fight my fears
I can't really breathe while trying snorkelling
but a few weeks ago I managed to calm down and really enjoyed it
coastal line of Malta is so beautiful clear water and full of fishes

Last weekend we did it
discover scuba diving course
was panicking when training the skills under water
but we had to go through
yeah

In the last weeks...

I found myself standing on seatings of the airport
shouting out mostly arab names of over 90 people
trying to bring them in the order for the check in
on their way to France
I felt most happy in the middle of this chaotic buzzling of
too much luggage, goodbye tears, happy expectations and
children running around
----------------------------------------------------------

Soldiers opened the gate
we sit in containers
15 bunk beds each or more
some are sleeping
there is no air, no breeze, just heat
my body is covered with flies
like everybody else's
here you eat and sleep if you can
"we are living like animals, you now"
-----------------------------------------------------------

I found myself in the most fancy restaurant
sweaty, in harem trousers and worn out t-shirt
eating expensive saffron salmon
trying to follow embassy talks
and being a little insecure in how to use all this cuttlery
-----------------------------------------------------------

My friend and I hiked for hours
down the cliffs
and swam to a bay with natural clay
we covered ourselves
and dried on a stone
-----------------------------------------------------------

I listen to all these young people
"it's better to die than keep on living like this'"
safety and dignity is not the same
and we are left without hopeful answers

we have mainstreamed media
and bombarded the world with advertisment
so that everybody shall want
still we are left with surprise when
everybody seems to take the message seriously
-----------------------------------------------------------

everything is salty

things move slowly here.
I have to learn to be patient.
It´s hard when you have the long days and just want to go home. To calm down in the evenings.
And a but: often I can´t be patient on behalf of the people I am working with. Sometimes we have been patient far too long.

in my street loitering is prohibited

i love this one
nearly all dairy products in malta are
imported from Denmark or Germany

cows on german alps
speaking arabic














the maltese cross
everywhere















undertaker
coffin maker